There are moments when you travel with anyone where you need a break.
Even when sisters travel.
Maybe it’s the ten minutes when they’re in the shower or perhaps you have to escape and wander around outside. It’s nothing against the person, it’s human nature to crave a little alone-time.
Which means that Jackie and I are off the norm a beat or two. We never reached that point in sixteen days of being joined at the hip during our trip to Wales. Our parents must be stunned as they watch from heaven, wondering where were these two girls who grew up having massive battles day after day. Yes, I readily admit that I caused many of them. Most of them. Hey, I’m a redhead, whadda ya want?
But there we were, in Pembrokeshire, Wales for the second time and so utterly in love with the place that what went wrong didn’t have the slightest impact on our dispositions. In a moment there was a new right thing taking place and all was charming again.
We Sisters Travel
Like our first solo trip to the Cinque Terre National Park in Italy, we had a flow to our daily actions.
“So, do you want to…”
“Sure, let’s…”
Her husband, known to us both since we were twelve and fourteen, still hates when we finish each other’s thoughts. We say: Get over it.
So during this wonderful trip, sister shorthand was fully in action. We’d pack a lunch and take a hike or grab a bus and check out a castle—there are an abundance of them in Wales, so we were never at a loss to find a new one.
We start our trips with a game plan, a spreadsheet of places to see and things to do. The only items we end up scheduling are those that have to be pre-purchased, such as a tour.
We literally have each other’s backs as we face opposite directions so that what’s behind one is paid attention to by the other. Our sister-code works. One states, “Move left.” The other does it immediately and in a moment the reason is clear. We’re not like the horror-movie folks who have to debate why a person is telling them to run from the scary guy in the mask.
During this pleasantness and yin/yang, there are occasional fluke moments.
You have a sister (me) who awakens from a deep sleep when feathers fall out of the pillows.
And you have another (Jackie) whose sinus-issues make her snore …
That’s a recipe for conflict.
Earplugs in, eye-covering on, I settled into the king bed we had to share one night when we finally arrived in London. Dog-tired from that one planned tour, I felt a deep sleep pending. Sister, equally as weary, did the same. Quietly (I thought), I did my breathing exercises, ten breaths in, ten breaths out, nine breaths in, nine breaths out. Yes, insomniac me felt sleep about to engulf my entire being. Yah!
Then it began. A problem with Sisters Travel.
What’s this? Snoring that matches my husband’s ability to shake the walls! How does such a big noise come out of such a little person? But there she was, Jackie’s belabored breath disrupting my much longed for doze.
Unlike with Alex—I wake him up, he rolls over, and goes right back to sleep—I can’t wake Jackie. We have trouble getting to sleep, so by golly if she’s out, I’m not about to cause both of us a restless night.
I did what I’ve done more than once when traveling with my husband.
I yanked cushions off chairs, grabbed a robe as a blanket and hunkered down on the floor at the foot of the bed.
Man, she was loud that night. The loudest of the entire trip. I screwed the earplugs in tighter and spent a lot of time praying: “Please let me sleep, please let me sleep.” Should I have intoned, “Please shut her up, please shut her up”? Maybe.
Two in the morning rolled around and I caught a break, things were quiet on the bed above me. I started to drift off. Yeah! Success.
An earplug must have come loose because I heard her stir. A blanket rustled, a pillow flipped, a hand patted the bed.
There was a slight panic in her voice as she asked, “Where are you?”
I groaned, no, don’t wake me up!
“Rosemary!”
My answer, “Shut up! I just got to sleep.”
I realized, oh gosh, that’s mean and added, “I love you.”
Her quiet murmur came, “Whatever.”
We drifted off.
In the morning, the bliss of our in sync sisterhood was back in place. One bad night’s sleep wasn’t enough to mar the joy of our travels and the work we’ve done to be best friends.
We’re already planning our next trip to Wales.
I wonder, can I sleep in noise cancelling headphones?
*Written with Jackie permission. Oh, and don’t worry–these sisters travel as often as we can.
Next up: What Equals Old Gray Stones and Colorful Landscapes?
You and your sister seem to have a bond similar to twins – like you guys are twins born two years apart. I don’t have a sister but reading about the two of you makes me want one.
And my husband has sleep apnea. Before he got his C-Pap, he snored all the time. Earplugs are so important.
We are like twins. When I first moved to Red Lodge–as a single woman who was dating–it caused her and her husband a few problems because people thought I was her! I’d get snide comments like, “Having fun, Jackie?” Or, “Where’s John tonight?” It was nice to know they were looking out for John but it took me/us a while to figure out where the hostility was coming from! Then we laughed.
Poor Jackie, she had a bad sinus doctor in her twenties who messed her up. Hence the snoring now. I’m glad your husband–and you–sleep better now!
I love reading these again….such fun times! I love traveling with you and would do it anytime in a heartbeat! We have made some of the best memories! I truly can’t believe we’ve been to Wales 3 times and Italy once when I never thought I’d leave Pennsylvania 🙂
And your move to Montana, and trips to San Diego, Albuquerque, St. Thomas, Alaska … I’m taking credit for starting it all with our Cinque Terre Adventure! Thanks for still loving me after I told you to shut up!
Baahahahahahahahaha I love it!
You didn’t know, did you?
Nope I didn’t hear that one before
Pretty funny stuff, eh?
I can hear and picture the whole thing!
Oh Rose Mary, that made me laugh! Sadly I don’t have a sister to share a bed with and the last time I tried sharing a twin with a friend, no sleep whatsoever was had. They had the audacity to breathe a bit loudly! The Husband wants some Isolate earplugs (because apparently I am the louder snorer, even though he both snores and takes up 80% of the bed). I’m petitioning for separate rooms.
Monika, I’m always so glad to share a chuckle! Jackie was a good sport about the whole thing. I sleep so lightly that it’s tough when someone has any sort of breathing issue. Good luck!
My relationship with my sister is so different, Rose Mary. We’re very close, but very polite and not always completely honest with each other. I think your way is better.
Hi Karen & thanks for stopping by. I loved your post about the voices in your head! Ah, sisters–Jackie and I are only 1.5 years apart, so growing up was challenging. We’re both thankful that we grew out of that. The Saga of the Impossibly Skinny Levi Jeans explains that turning point for us. Honesty can be tough, like the time Jackie said, “Shut up, you always think your ideas are the best!” My feelings were hurt, but mostly because she was telling the truth! We poured wine and talked about it and she helped me deliver my ideas in a better fashion. Progress!
Yeah, the truth hurts sometimes, but wine definitely softens the blow!
🙂 Yep!
I wish I had as good of a relationship with my sister as you do with yours. Ours is getting better, but it is a process.
It sure is a process, Jason. I hope that you two come to be even half as close as Seester and I are–it will make all the difference!
I have been very lucky in that I have never had a partner who snores so loud that it keeps me awake.
My exes and current girlfriend? Not so lucky.
My husband used to snore horribly. Turns out he has sleep apnea (even though he isn’t overweight) and he would stop breathing more than once a minute when he slept. He now has a c-pap machine which means no snoring and probably a longer life-span for him.
It is great that you and your sister have such a close relationship. I’m an only child so I can only hear about the relationship of siblings and wonder what that is like.
Jackie’s issues are a sinus problem that a doctor caused in her twenties. My husband, like yours, has sleep apnea (I diagnosed him!) and stops breathing. But I can’t convince him to see a doc about that. Geez! I’m glad your husband is sleeping better now. Yeah for modern medicine!
With three siblings and ten cousins around growing up, I can’t fathom what being an only child would be like, Erica. pros and cons to each!
What a nice, positive post on sibling love.
There are two years between my sister and me. We used to argue and fight as children. We grew closer in our teens.
It has been great following your journey in Wales – hopefully you will return to UK soil someday soon!
It’s great to become BFF with your sister, isn’t it, Phoenicia? Jackie and I used to fight like banshees growing up. Yikes.
We’d come back to Wales in September if we could! Lovely!
Siblings have a unique relationship. They love you more than anyone else, and know everything about you so they can hurt you the most. Thanks for sharing this with us.
I’m lucky, William, that my siblings are loving. Childhood spats are long in the past.
Sounds like you have a great relationship with your sister. You are so lucky. I do not have a sister but my cousin and I are very close. We are going away for the weekend in August to do some sightseeing. I can’t wait. It’s important to have another woman that knows you well. They get you without you having to say too much. Thanks for sharing.
It took many years of teenage battling to get to this friendship, Sabrina. Back then, neither of us would have ever thought this would happen! I’m glad you have a cousin to travel with. You are right–you’ve got to have that woman friend (or a few of them!) who “get” you!
Great post. You are so blessed to have such a great relationship with your sister, even if she does snore.
Donna, she’s getting back at me for being such a brat when we were growing up. I do often wonder why she didn’t lock me in a closet!
You two are so darn cute I imagine you are a blast to be around, especially with a good bottle of wine. This is a wonderful story RoseMary and it made me smile. Thank you!
Come visit, Marty…do you drink red? 🙂
Rose, what a fun and loving post. I must say you take snoring kinder than I do. When my husband snores, I yank his pillow which forces him to roll over. In the morning he doesn’t even remember which is probably a good thing. I had a hard time figuring out which picture to pin – they’re all winners – but finally settled on ‘happy sisters’.
Thanks for seeing the fun in this, Lenie! We crack ourselves up, but that doesn’t mean others always find us humorous!
I’m amazed by your husband and mine–he’s the same way–never remembers in the a.m. that I yelled at him or swiped his pillow. That’s funny.
Thanks for sharing Happy Sisters!
Rose, you are SO lucky to have a Seester. No matter what similarities or differences you may have, you have one of the strongest bonds on the planet. That of the biological sisterhood.
You are right, Doreen! We’ve been through a lot with each other, but keep–thank God–surviving and getting stronger. She makes me a better person.
Ahh the snoring issue. I agree with Ken. Nothing but a wall between you will ultimately resolve the issue:)
As Jackie’s grandkids say each time they relate a calamity to them (they are 4 & 3), “We lived.” And so we did!
Rosemary, I can think of no solution for the sleep problem other than a wall between you.
And that’s where the lovely Edith Cottage came in so handy–two rooms!
And, yes, I guess we do look alike.
Oh Yeah we do!
That’s a pretty funny post….thanks for putting up with my snoring!! Well, you had no choice, really….sorry about that!
I’m so used to it with Alex!