As noted on the About Me page of my website,
I observe a lot.
Along with those observations comes a running review of what I’m seeing. It can be people’s behavior (are we not endlessly fascinating?), something in the news (when I pay attention to it), or more frequently my two loves: books and travels. When I’m alone, these thoughts roll around in my writer’s head until I finally stop what I’m doing and still the musings by popping preliminary notes into Scrivener or writing them out. If husband and I are road-tripping somezxcvwhere, the poor chap puts up with my running litany of what I’m seeing until he points to the Kindle on my lap and suggests, didn’t you want to finish that book?
I get the message.
Some of what I notice
Attire:
Standards have drastically changed in our country for clothing that is acceptable in public. If I wore noise blocking headphones, signage was covered, and I deplaned in Newark Airport, it would be clear I was in the USA merely by the attire. Americans are too frequently too casual, wearing clothes that look like they rolled out of bed in them.
On the last couple of flights, I’ve actually seen young people wearing pajamas to board a plane to Europe. I’ve yet to see anyone on trips within Italy, France, Germany, Spain … dress that casually—except for that time in Amsterdam when two Brits wore their pjs downstairs for the continental breakfast. They were politely asked to return upstairs and don appropriate outfits.
Travel:
The same approach applies to TripAdvisor, where I’ve been reviewing since 2008 on hotels, restaurants, places to go, and things to do. I’ve written hundreds of contributions. I love when I get a helpful vote or if someone emails me for more details as they plan their trip. My goal is to express my experience and to provide information on why I rated a place as I did so you can assess for yourself.
Restaurants:
When we dine in a nice restaurant in the USA, anticipating five-star service, and the wait person approaches our table, with, “Hi, guys,” I cringe, seething openly looking myself up and down. Yes, I hold off until the person leaves, turn to Alex. I ask, “I am still a woman, right?” He, being a fellow, doesn’t mind this wording so much. I deplore it, debating leaving a note, “Your tip went down a percentage every time you called me a guy.”
Books:
I love writing reviews on Amazon because I rely heavily on other reviewers when I am debating a purchase, so it’s important to give back to that community. My comments are as objective as possible in order that a reader can take what I’ve said and make a judgment of whether or not to purchase. I try to explain why I disliked a book so that someone can think: “Well, that doesn’t bother me, I think I’ll give it a whirl.” This is, after all, my opinion. Recapping the story doesn’t work for me since Amazon already provides that information. I try instead to discuss what pulled me in or repulsed me.
More Books and Observations of Writing
Rants, to be sure. The bottom line is that as an author, I’m getting more brutal the more I read and the more review I write. Note, when I’m given a book for free by the author and find it less than stellar, I don’t post a bad review. I think that’s slapping someone in the face. If it’s truly awful, I simply delete it. If I can find a clear way to convey my personal taste in why I didn’t like it, I may post. Each book is reviewed on its own merits.
And the opposite is true. When I discover a new author, Erik Therme, Norma Huss, Duncan Simpson, I write glowing reviews, feature them on my website and share them across my social media.
Since I’m a writer, certain to receive negative reviews on my own work, let’s focus on books and why I review the way I do:
Here’s the thing—I have completely lost my patience with bad writing. Completely. I’m done, I’m over it. I find it difficult to be kind anymore. Because of the onslaught of self-publishing opportunities, some authors are ignoring the fact that you must, must—let me state it again—must take your red pen—and hire someone with a red pen—to read your book over and over again before you hit that publish button.
So, Dear Authors, Listen to this Observation
You must have critical, promise to rip-you-to-the-core readers review your book. We love the friends who say, That’s nice, good job. But that doesn’t help us be better. I love the folks who point out the flaws—unintentional threads left hanging, grammatical errors. You must find those people before you consider self-publishing, no different from taking those steps before querying an agent or seeking a publisher.
When Raymond Chandler’s The Big Sleep (Bogart version) became a film, after finishing, someone asked, “Ray, who killed Sternwood’s chauffeur?” He neglected tying up that loose end. Even the best writers miss a beat—but it will be the exception, not the norm for them.
I almost always love Lawrence Block. His Burglar Books make me howl with laughter and entertain me every time. They’re on my bookshelf and scheduled for rereading (and reviewing) during hot summer days. I can’t read his Matthew Scudder novels. Not my thing. The writing is well done, it’s the character I have issues with. I don’t like him!
Block’s Burglar series is like Lawrence Sanders and his McNally books. I am always thirsty, hungry, and long for the beach when I read the delightful McNally books. His Deadly Sin books are too dark even for a woman who once loved the macabre. Yet again, they are well-written.
Do I expect my novel to be free from bad reviews because I’ve worked it to death, had honest beta readers, and an editor who loves a red pen? Of course not. With my writing, all I can do is be confident that I have put my best efforts out to the world.
Summing Up the World of an Observer
Standards of living, standards of writing, standards of service … I don’t want to let these things fall by the wayside. Be tough reviewing ourselves. Keep the critiques going and coming and fuel the desire to rise up a level or two. Let’s not become slobs either in how we dress or in our approach to work or to our lives.
Care, a little, about what others think when you launch yourself and your opinions into the world.
**
Read: Little Women
We were just talking about this at work the other day as one of our tenants called me “ma’am.” He’s southern and it is just how they greet a woman. Didn’t bother me a bit. I was called “miss” a while back and that didn’t really sit well. “Guy” sends me to the moon. I think it is just a matter of being respectful to whomever you are talking to. Hey, we should all wear name tags that say “Just call me Jackie (insert your own name here as I don’t think everyone wants to be called Jackie, although it is a nice name). 🙂
It’s all a matter of respect. For ourselves and for others.
It is a nice name and I have been called Jackie any number of times. HA. Remember when Mom would run through the whole litany of us until she got the right kid?
“Guy” sigh, just hate hearing it referring to me!
I think the “Hey Guys” is current vernacular, and maybe bothers you the way “No problem” used to bother me when I’d say “thank you” and get that response. Then I realized it’s just part of language and culture changing, and if it’s a genuine”no problem,” then I have no problem with that. Would it be a kindness, though, for you to let your server know that that greeting bothers you? I don’t think it’s a purposeful attempt to be annoying, but just how s/he is used to greeting customers (even though it probably shouldn’t be the norm in a five-star place).
I’ve often thought of letting a server know I don’t like the reference. Jethro usually asks me to behave–ha!